There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
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