My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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