have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
