So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
