the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize