I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize