...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize