So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
