She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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