He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
