Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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