please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Edward fifth and chaser hands
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
as a side note pls kill me
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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