Porn is love you can see.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
