When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Randomize
