We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
