Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
There's even glitter on my cock...
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