my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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