Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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