Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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