I want to have your abortion
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Just invented taco cereal.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
