At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize
