I got her a Nickelback box set.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
