She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
