She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
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