I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Randomize
