My friends, they love my intelligence
just come out here and I will go home with you...
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
We got so high we made milksteak
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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