i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize