lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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