I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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