On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
