why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
