Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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