We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
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Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
