mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
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