Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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