So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize