Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize
