this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
