and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
