you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize