you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
