Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
