If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
they're like a gay fantastic four
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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