she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
