you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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