That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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