i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
