Just fell off a train. Bad.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize