wrigley field is MILF paradise
oh god the rape fog is back!
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
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