What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
